Here at Sandwich we consider ourselves citizens of the world, eternal nomads and intellectually driven adventurers on a quest to find the ultimate enlightenment through the process of world travel. In other words, we liked Europe and are willing to marry for passports.
BERLIN...IN BULLET POINTS.
BERLIN...IN BULLET POINTS.
• Free Walking Tour surpasses awesome. They should be given Nobel prizes for their efforts in Marxist styled tours where you only pay in tips which work wonderfully for the eternally unemployed like us. P.S Ben the tour guide art student from Maine with the really twight pants – rufen Sie mich an!
• Checkpoint Charlie = Disneyland of the DDR
• The Wall (Mauer) is everywhere. Well its remains. It’s even mapped out in flat stones all around Berlin proving just how unhinged the allies and Soviets were.
• Minga can’t speak Deutsch to save herself.
• Aussies don’t know how to dress. Wearing sweatpants and cleavage popping singlets whilst complaining about your horrid hangover is NOT cool when you’re at the Sachsenhausen Concentration Camp.
• In fact, Aussies should be banned from travelling as they’ve done the unthinkable – surpassed even the Yanks in the ‘most hideously annoying and vapid tourist’ category. Yep, I said it.
• Aroma Coffee Chain is apparently ‘the enemy’ according to Israeli tourist.
• Don’t say ‘Jüden’ out loud.
• Hobos don’t speak English.
• Best Deutsch cigarettes are F6, not ‘gay’ Davidoff according to fit tobacco boy (again call me!)
• German Opera is way kühl – particularly as you have no idea what’s going on.
• Hitler’s bunker and final suicide place is below a carpark – just how they’d like to remember him by.
• German History Museum kicks British Museum arse.
• Lady at the German Film Museum is completely bi-polar and needs to stay on her meds.
• Number of Daniel Bruhl molestings = 0 (Epic Fail).
• Beautiful boys EVERYWHERE donning Jimmy Dean quiffs and black rimmed glasses. Who knew Germans can be funny AND hot. If you don’t believe us, watch this:
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